Exploration
by be-paychent
Summary: Series where amy and karma *explore* each other and discover how they feel. [Chapter one was supposed to be written like that, its Karma] Also they reason the AN are like that is because I wrote these for a blog.
1. First

—**-**

**i haven't been writing too long but i tried. i hope you enjoy.**

—

She did it playfully, but that didn't change the fact that it made me shiver. We were in the car and she had grabbed my thigh, looked into my eyes, and sang the lyric "And I feel your warmth, and it feels like home". Of course we were listening to her favorite unknown artist Depeche Mode. Sadly I knew every lyric as well because I would do anything for her including memorizing _Here is the House. _

We were driving home from one of Shane's parties. I had a few drinks, but she knew not to, in order to get us home. She was always my spotter. If I went to a party, it was only with her; to make sure I was safe. And if I left a party, it was only with her; to make sure I was safe. I loved her for that, I always have.

We pulled into her driveway.

By the time we reached the basement we were in a full-fledged tickle war. She knew I had a weak spot on the back of my knee and she gets me every time. We fell on the couch together. It was wide enough where one of us wasn't always about to fall off, but skinny enough where we had to stay close._ I was okay with this._ She tickled me to the point where tears came to my eyes. That was when she knew it was time to stop. I got up to grab the chips from the basement cabinet while she pulled up Netflix on the TV. We watched **When Harry met Sally **for the ten-millionth time. I wasn't all too fond of the movie but she loved it so how could I not. Also every time we watched it I got to cuddle with her, which I was very fond of. Her warmth made me tired and combined with the John Daly I had at the party, I wasn't 100% thinking straight.

At about the halfway point I turned the volume down and moved out from under the blanket to sit facing her. "What are the bases?" I obviously mumbled this and did so in a tone that made me sound quite naive.

"Yo Chewbacca, would you mind repeating that in English?" She giggled a sweet laugh that made me feel safe.

"What are the bases for lesbians?" I realized how stupid of a question that was when I saw her face starting to blush, "I'm sorry, I'm not thinking. You don't have to answer."

I started to get up to get more chips when she touched my cheek. _She leaned in. _Her teeth grazed my lower lip with such elegance that I felt weak. Her tongue entered my mouth and I returned the favor. Her hand was in my hair and mine in hers. I knew I shouldn't feel this way but something about her made me crazy. Just as I thought she was going to unclip my bra for the first time,

she retreated.

_First._

—

**I know it was a quick read but I hope I get a chance to submit more.**

—


	2. Second

—-

point of view of Amy.

—-

She rolled over and kissed me. Not one of those little pecks, or a 'good morning, I'm getting out of bed now' kiss. This was a different kind of kiss, she meant it and I could feel that. I kissed her back, I loved kissing her. I felt her hand move from my back to my butt.

Karma had never really ever shown interest in moving faster with our fake relationship before except in… _Oh I get it, this is a dream_. I didn't let that thought stop me though, I ran my hand through her hair and started to kiss slower and with more passion. Sure enough though, there was the alarm clock noise.

I woke up and turned my alarm clock off. When I hit the button I noticed a note.

"Dear Amy, We will be back at 3:00pm. There is chicken in the fridge. Karma is **not** allowed over. Love, Mom"

It was currently 9:30am. I was about to get out of bed when I figured, why not stay in bed.

I let my mind wonder and found myself thinking of all the dreams I had had of my best friend lately. Realizing I was in an empty house for a good amount of time, I allowed myself to start imagining different situations where me and Karma could be intimate. My hands started to explore my body as my day-dreams became more vivid.

Karma clawed my neck. I touched my own neck

Karma wrapped her arms around my torso. I let my had travel from my stomach to my back and to my front again.

Karma squeezed my breast. I felt myself and imagined Karma.

Karma slid her hand into my pants. I slid my hand into my pants.

I had never explored myself or anyone for that matter so this was a whole new experience. I slowly started to rub my wet folds. My whole body started to heat up with this new intimacy. I slipped one finger in and closed my eyes. I had one hand on my breast and one hand down south. My breathing became heavier when I slipped a second finger in and started to gain speed. My back started to arch and I could feel my face getting flush. I imagined Karma on top of me kissing my neck and herself being the one pleasuring me. I let out a loud gasp with the name Karma on my lips when I climaxed.

—

An hour later it was 11:00am and I figured Karma could come over and leave before my mom, Lauren and her dad came home.

Karma came over and we were hanging out on my bed when she suggested we practiced.

"Practice what?" I knew exactly what she meant. Ever since she admitted I was an amazing kisser she could stop kissing me.

"You _know_ what," She leaned in and kissed me hard and passionately. We both fell over so that we were laying on our sides, facing each other and making out

Karma kissed my neck. I ran my hands threw her beautiful brunette hair.

Karma fell to her back and pulled me on top of her, holding on tight. She moved back to my lips.

Karma took my bra off me and started to feel me up. We switched positions, I was on the bottom and she was on top feeling my breasts.

She then let her hand travel below my waist. She quickly started to rub my folds and occasionally whispering something like "Do you like that" into my ear. I did like it, very much. Although she never entered me, the different finger twists and speeds and variations allowed me to climax for a second time that morning.

I had then realized this was part of her plan, this was

_Second._

—-

I hope you guys liked this. It was surprisingly alot harder to write a graphic version of the first part.

If you want to give me any suggestions on the series message me!

—


	3. Love

**So trouble in paradise, This one has no smut (unfortunately) but it will keep you on your toes. **

"I don't want to ever see you again!" I screamed as I ran out the door. My eyes were teary, I couldn't think straight, and I was mad. What I had just seen was going to give me night terrors for a long time. I sat in my car crying.

I didn't know where to go so I went to the only place I could feel safe right now. When I got to the house I let myself in and ran upstairs. All I wanted to do was relieve some of the stress and what better way than with sex.

"Take me as I am," I pulled off my shirt and jumped on the bed. Well actually more like on **her**. Laying on her _trying _to kiss her neck through my short breath I began to unbutton her shirt.

I guess she heard an escaped cry because she looked confused, "Karma, _hun,_ is everything okay?" she had avoided every attempt off mine to seduce her and pushed me up so I was sitting.

I was crying and I could sense that my face was as red as a tomato. "It… its.. Liam he… he was with ano-… another girl," I collapsed crying and Amy hugged me but I could feel how much she wanted to push me off the bed.

"And why does that bother you so much?" She was becoming frustrated, I could see it in the way here mouth started to slowly curl downwards and she furrowed her brow.

"Because I thought he loved me," I went to rest my head on her shoulder but she moved just in time so that I had to catch myself to sit back up, "And he was with some other girl"

Amy stood up, looking as if someone had just broken her favorite vinyl.

She was yelling now, "Why do you care, what about us. What about Saturday morning? Did none of that mean anything to you?" She grabbed her coat, "I going to drive around, I don't care what you do, Mom and Bruce wont be home for hours"

—

I got in the car and started to drive away. I didn't know where to go so I just kept driving away from my home. The tears rolling down my face told me I shouldn't be driving but I ignored them. I remembered the picture of me and her at Halloween i the seventh grade. I was a scarecrow and she, Dorothy. On the back she had written her name and phone number. Her perfect handwriting and the way she put hearts instead of zeros made me think of how much she really did love me.

_How could she do this to me. _I started to lose sight of the road but I didn't care. _I love her. I love-d her. _I didn't notice the light changing colors. _No, I do love her. But she will never love me. _I was in the middle of the intersection and i saw that the truck to my left couldn't stop in time. only one thing crossed my mid ad i let out the loudest cry i ever cried, "I LOVE YOU KARMA ASHCR—"

—

_Hello?_

_Is this Karma Ashcroft?_

_Yes, can I help you?_

_There's been an accident._

_Zen? My parents?_

_There is a young woman in the ER who was holding a picture that had your name written on the back._

_No…_

I dropped the phone in complete shock and disbelief, remembering the time when Amy had put the picture in her car to remind herself of the perfect Halloween always.

_Miss…? Hello? Are you there?_


	4. Regrets

**Hey guys so I didn't really proof read it to be honest, but here's regrets :) I hope you guys like it even tho the ending is a little awkward**

"I'm so sorry," I held her hand, "Just please come back to me."

_It's been six days._

I haven't actually left the hospital yet. Shane keeps bringing me clothing in the morning before he goes to school. My parents talked to the board and their allowing me to skip school for a week. Farrah and Bruce haven't visited yet, they say the gay spirits caused this accident and they wont tolerate a lesbian costing them insurance fees. Lauren came by on Thursday, I think I might of even seen a tear in her eye too. She only came by because Penelope wanted proof Amy was in a com— _Karma no, don't think about it._

The only upside, and I mean if something were to be called an upside, it would be that I get to give Amy her sponge baths. This was the only time I could be in true privacy with her.

—

I want to scream, but I cant. I can't do anything. This is the most agonizing thing I have ever experienced. Sometimes one of my eyelids gets pushed open and I can see Karma lying next to me crying. I've been playing this game with myself where I listen to the voices and come up with a name and what they look like. And most of the time the voices come from doctors so when they check my eyes I get to see how close I was. It's actually kind of entertaining.

The one thing I look forward to everyday is my sponge bath. It feels so nice to get to change into a clean gown and have Karma wash me down. I heard the clock ding signalling it was five o'clock a.k.a. bath time.

Nancy, _this is what I call the sponge nurse_, comes in and exchanges words with Karma.

"How's she doing?"

"Fine, I think she's having fun right now. She's that kind of person."

"I hope she's having enough fun for the two of you, your eyes are still puffy"

_I'm assuming the nurse handed Karma a tissue because I heard someone blow their nose and sniffle a little._

"Thank you," _I heard the sponge and bucket swoosh from Nancy to Karma_, "I got it from here."

A minute later I felt the sponge on my arm and I could hear Karma faintly crying,"I love you, Amy Raudenfeld," _a sniffle, "_More than you could dare to imagine. I _love _you, _love _you." I could hear her starting to sob and that made me want to tell her how much she meant to me. How much I cared for her and loved her.

It took a while but eventually everyone in the room had their emotions in check. I felt the sponge again on my arm and then on my shoulder and to my neck. _Oh my neck, _the pulse point where Karma used to, oh so delicately nibble at my skin. _At least I can still have dirty sensations while I'm in a coma. _She moved the sponge to my stomach and rubbed so gently that it felt that I was being kissed my hundreds of angles. After a good amount of time Karma moved to my feet and then my calves and knees, to my thighs, and as if she could read my mind she began to massage my inner thigh. _Oh Karma. _She quickly remembered that she had skipped my breasts and began to sponge those.

_I love you, Karma Ashcroft_

—

I once again cleaned her inner thighs and almost too coincidentally at that moment her heart monitor indicated a rise in BPM. I went to wash her lower abdomen for a second time because when she gets scared the only way she calms down is if you rub her tummy. I figured better safe than sorry so I proceeded to sponge with stomach.

She shivered. _I swear she just shivered. _And not a shiver that indicates that she was cold but a shiver than was caused by chills down her back. _Was it possible she was reacting to being aroused? _

I looked around just to be sure and when the coast was clear I gently touched her folds. _She shivered again_. I began to rub her. And when I touched her breast ever so subtly I could of sworn she moaned.

—

_Karma Ashcroft drives me crazy._

I was in a coma and she found a way to push me to the edge. _Karma, Karma, Karma Oh! _I kept repeating her name in my head hoping it would simply be spoken.

She wasn't doing anything too R-rated after she removed her fingers from my folds and so she decided to 'clean' my breasts yet again. She had one hand fondling my breast while the other lay intertwined with my fingers.

She kissed my neck right in the pulse point and I needed to have her right then and there. I squeezed her hand as hard as I could. And kept squeezing.

"Oh My God," Karma squeezed my hand and with her free hand I could feel her putting a gown on my still body.

"Doctor! I need a Doctor!" The door opened and a man's voice examined the scene. "She squeezed my hand," Karma's voice was calm and soft and made me feel so safe.

I opened my eyes just enough to see the two talking but I soon realized they couldn't notice that my eyes were open just a sliver.

Karma leaned in to kiss me on the cheek and using all the will power I could muster up, I turned my head and caught her lips on mine.

"I love you Raudenfeld"

Still groggy I managed a, "I love you more Ashcroft"

"Not possible" We both giggled and she hugged me tight.

"I'm so sorry," Karma started to tear up again, and I remembered that I had walked out on her just a week ago, "Just please come back to me"

"Of course you goofball"


	5. Third

_How does this always happen? I don't think I'll survive another fight._

"I heard what you did. How could you do that? You could've blown our cover!" She was angry, anyone could she that but, I don't know why. "Anyone could of seen you two," she started to sound a little more questioning but that moment was quickly interrupted by her anger again, "You were in public, anyone could of seen you!"

I was honest to god beyond confused, "Could you further elaborate on what you heard?" the sad part was there were two things she could have heard of.

"Are you f*cking kidding me, how many things have you done in public that could have outed us?" Her voice went from hating me to being hurt by me.

After my coma me and Karma had started to drift. We were still 'fake girlfriends' but I wasn't all too sure about being best friends. She spent less and less time with everyone. Her and Liam stopped seeing each other, Shane said they hadn't talked in a month and we hadn't hooked up in almost 2 weeks, not including for our show.

I felt deprived. I couldn't go much longer without some form of satisfaction and answering some questions along the way wouldn't of hurt.

The ugly truth was though, I had made more questions for myself by macking on two different people's faces in the past week, neither of which were Karma.

I sat on my bed and she did the same. As I began to explain what had happened in the past week her face quickly went back to disappointment and hurt.

_Of course when I told her what had happened I left out most of the details. But what really happened was replaying in my head:_

_I don't understand why I didn't feel anything._ I saw Oliver from across the quad. When he started to walk towards me I closed my locker and met him in an open hallway. Without even letting him speak I grabbed his hair and pulled him in. When I kissed him my mouth was closed tight, but seeking some kind of feeling I opened my mouth slightly. His tongue eagerly entered my mouth to explore every crevasse. There was something wrong though, I felt nothing. I pulled away with my eyes open. His eyes stayed closed and his mouth open, almost frozen. I hurried away before he opened his eyes.

The party wasn't one of Hester's, but that didn't change the fact that half the people there knew me. Shane had brought me to "take my mind off all this bullsh*t". From across the room I saw a girl eyeing me up, I guess I could allow it. She nodded towards the stairs and turned to put her drink down then headed up. Shane seeing this, took the drink out my hand and gave me a smile, "go, have fun." I followed the stranger up the green carpeted stairs. _Karma would of never approved of a party with green carpets_. When I reached the top of the stairs the girl was no where to be seen but one door was open. As a entered what appeared to be a teenage girls room I felt a hand grab my wrist and pull on my arm. Before I knew what was going on I was pinned against a wall having my neck assaulted by the stranger. The bed was getting closer and closer, then I realized I wasn't on the wall anymore and the girl was pulling me across the room. I found myself laying on the bed with the girl ignoring my lips, planting kisses from my neck to my abdomen and eventually my waist. I felt my button come undone and my jeans slid down my legs.

"Stop!" Karma had her head in her hands and I could hear the uncertainty in her voice. "Are you sure?"

"Sure about what," I had a feeling she was talking about me telling her what I had done with this girl.

"Are you sure that you want to take the next steps with **a girl**?"

"Oh so now you're questioning my gayness? We've been over this, I'm not straight, I don't know what I am, but I'm not not into girls." We both giggled at the nervous tension in the air.

"No, are you sure you want to do that with a stranger?" She moved her hand to my thigh and looked into my eyes.

I gulped loudly and obviously. She grabbed my wrist and pulled me to the wall. "She pushed me against the wall and assaulted my neck, huh?" _Oh so now she was going to tease me, two can play at that game. _She began to kiss my neck harshly and moved her hands through my hair. I let out a fake moan to show that I was going to play along. She then basically threw me on the bed. "She didn't even bother to kiss my lips?" Karma Ashcroft took my shirt off my body. She nibbled at my collarbone and didn't forget to pay attention to my breasts. I moaned at her soft hands exploring my body. She lifted her kisses and whispered in her soothing soft voice, "You can't fake something like that Raudenfeld". This sent shivers down my spine. She pulled my leggings to my ankles with confidence and I felt her kisses stop with uncertainty when she had met my green lace underwear.

"Are you sure?" _Why were those two always paired together? _To get her to stopped questioning me on everything I guess I'll just have to make sure she's never uncertain.

"How could I not be?"

"Wait, did you and that stranger ever..."

"God no, you're the **only** person I could imagine doing that with"

"Doing what?"

"Going to

_Third"_


End file.
